Femme - Any woman who dresses in feminine attire (ranging
from bi-curious to lesbian) that dates, engages in sex or becomes involved in a
relationship with a Dom or Transgendered Man. **(In certain cases, they date other femmes as well)**
The Barbie
This type of Femme is the lady of all ladies. They are the women that even straight women fantasize about; they are generally always made up, dressed up and “accessoried” out. They are the epitome of the term “girlie-girl” and have no problem being treated as such. They prefer heels over every other footwear and tend to travel in small packs.
*Doms beware*--MANY Barbies, though sightfully delicious, tend to focus so much on their appearance that they lack other functions like conversation and personal goals. They are usually conditioned to having people take care of them because of their looks, therefor many of them serve better as trophy side pieces than wives. Proceed with caution*
*Doms beware*--MANY Barbies, though sightfully delicious, tend to focus so much on their appearance that they lack other functions like conversation and personal goals. They are usually conditioned to having people take care of them because of their looks, therefor many of them serve better as trophy side pieces than wives. Proceed with caution*
The ChapStick
This type of Femme is cutesy but not as hung up on their looks as The Barbie. They have no problem wearing a pair of heels when necessary or on a night out on the town. However they will throw on a pair of sneakers or flats quicker than you can say “Bakers”. They are generally fun to be around because of their tomboyish spirit and their ‘I’m just as tough as you if I have to be’ demeanor. They tend to have a lot of male, Dom or Trans Men friends (all of which want to sleep with her but never got the chance to).
The Semi-Dom
This Femme isn’t a Femme at all! They are Doms in drag and have no problem admitting to such an accusation. They can dress and rock the highest of heel like The Barbies but some of their personalities are harder than the hardest Dom. They are the dominant ones in everything from friendships to sexual encounters. They allure most of their partners with their firecracker attitudes and witty tongues. They have always been into women and love to conquer them just as much as anyone else. They usually engage in femme on femme relationships but when they do date a Dom or Trans Men, it is usually them who become the submissive one.
Building the Alliance..
Interview with Monique Fontaine
Treat Her Like A Lady....
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1. Many people, even those who are a part of the LGBTQ, have little knowledge of what the “T” stands for. Can you kick a little (or a lot) of knowledge? And what does the “T” mean to you?
The “T” stands for transsexual and being someone different. Many people view transsexuals as tabu or something out of the norm. I view it as being special. We have lived both genders. It makes us like mystical creatures...like unicorns. (laughs)
2. I want you to think back. Do you remember when you noticed your outer appearance didn’t represent who you are? How long did it take you to come to terms with it and was it a struggle?
I was extremely young. Probably two or three years old. I played with Barbie dolls and dressed up. Of course I didn’t know what gay was..(laughs)…At about 11 years old I was heavily into 'Spice Girls' and in the 7th grade I started dressing as a fem boy. By high school I had come to terms with it. It has not been so much a struggle, but more of a life process.
3. Were you raised in a household where alternative lifestyles were accepted?
I became a Trans Woman at the age of 18. Even though it wasn’t present in my household, it was accepted. My mother told me that she had already knew and was perfectly okay with it. I had no father figure to worry about.
4. Did you immediately divulge this with your friends and family? Significant other (if you are dating)?
Yes! They were my outlet. At 17 and 18 I had lots of gay friends, so I didn’t really have to “tell” them. Dating, however, was rough. I identified as a gay boy in the beginning, but that lead to me dating other gay males. This was not my interest. At one point in time, I was heavily dating and the guy, after visiting, decided we should stop sleeping together (I was too fem). That was my last gay boyfriend.
5. Are you open upon meeting a potential romantic partner or is it something you feel you should share once you get to know the person?
I usually do not [disclose the information upfront]. However I won’t hide it either. It’s usually on a need to know basis. Because I identify as a woman, that is what I tell people. I am completely honest and most of the time they will already know
6. Okay, so I have to ask. Do you identify as straight, bi, or homo?
I may flirt with females, but I definitely identify as a heterosexual female.
7. The men that you date, do they identify as straight or homosexual?
The men I date are straight men. People always ask “is your boyfriend straight or gay”. This is one of the most hated questions.
8. How do you feel when/if people to refer to you as “him” or “he”?
It use to happen more in the past (being referred to as him), but not so often now. I use to get offended. Some days I’ll get snappy and other says I will simply correct the person. It depends on my mood.
9. What impact has society had on you and your decision to be yourself freely?
Society has had a good and bad impact on my decision to be myself. Society is often comparing transsexuals to freak or to what they have seen on t.v. I have had an opportunity to educate people on the matter when asked certain questions. It can be a double edged sword.
10. What advice would you give someone who is struggling with their identity?
Talk about it! But read, read, read. Always stay positive and don’t do anything “stupid” because there is hope!
11. What is a typical day like for you living in NYC? What type of things do you encounter?
My life is pretty normal, sometimes boring. (Laughs). I go to work and I go out every once in a while.
12. Do you ever wonder what the days would be like had you not been brave enough to follow your heart?
I know I would be unhappy. I wouldn’t be ME!
13. Do you feel there are enough resources geared towards transgenders and those who are considering it?
Yes and no. I feel that there are more readily available resources for Trans Men than Trans Women. It seems to be more acceptable.
14. Outside of this interview, are there other ways can you contribute to educate others about who are?
My method would be verbal education. I am not shy and do not mind answering questions.
15. What is the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the following words?
Woman: glamorous
Man: dominate
Unique: ME!
Change: To be comfortable enough to live the way you are
DinMag: Empowerment. A lifestyle. Knowledge.
16. Is there anything that you would like to say to the readers of DinMag?
Thank you to the creator and Jay for thinking of me to be a part of DinMag. If we all stick together, we can break the barrier of adversity! There is no I in TEAM!
Interview Questions Created by: Mary P
Phone Interview Conducted by: Dez
The “T” stands for transsexual and being someone different. Many people view transsexuals as tabu or something out of the norm. I view it as being special. We have lived both genders. It makes us like mystical creatures...like unicorns. (laughs)
2. I want you to think back. Do you remember when you noticed your outer appearance didn’t represent who you are? How long did it take you to come to terms with it and was it a struggle?
I was extremely young. Probably two or three years old. I played with Barbie dolls and dressed up. Of course I didn’t know what gay was..(laughs)…At about 11 years old I was heavily into 'Spice Girls' and in the 7th grade I started dressing as a fem boy. By high school I had come to terms with it. It has not been so much a struggle, but more of a life process.
3. Were you raised in a household where alternative lifestyles were accepted?
I became a Trans Woman at the age of 18. Even though it wasn’t present in my household, it was accepted. My mother told me that she had already knew and was perfectly okay with it. I had no father figure to worry about.
4. Did you immediately divulge this with your friends and family? Significant other (if you are dating)?
Yes! They were my outlet. At 17 and 18 I had lots of gay friends, so I didn’t really have to “tell” them. Dating, however, was rough. I identified as a gay boy in the beginning, but that lead to me dating other gay males. This was not my interest. At one point in time, I was heavily dating and the guy, after visiting, decided we should stop sleeping together (I was too fem). That was my last gay boyfriend.
5. Are you open upon meeting a potential romantic partner or is it something you feel you should share once you get to know the person?
I usually do not [disclose the information upfront]. However I won’t hide it either. It’s usually on a need to know basis. Because I identify as a woman, that is what I tell people. I am completely honest and most of the time they will already know
6. Okay, so I have to ask. Do you identify as straight, bi, or homo?
I may flirt with females, but I definitely identify as a heterosexual female.
7. The men that you date, do they identify as straight or homosexual?
The men I date are straight men. People always ask “is your boyfriend straight or gay”. This is one of the most hated questions.
8. How do you feel when/if people to refer to you as “him” or “he”?
It use to happen more in the past (being referred to as him), but not so often now. I use to get offended. Some days I’ll get snappy and other says I will simply correct the person. It depends on my mood.
9. What impact has society had on you and your decision to be yourself freely?
Society has had a good and bad impact on my decision to be myself. Society is often comparing transsexuals to freak or to what they have seen on t.v. I have had an opportunity to educate people on the matter when asked certain questions. It can be a double edged sword.
10. What advice would you give someone who is struggling with their identity?
Talk about it! But read, read, read. Always stay positive and don’t do anything “stupid” because there is hope!
11. What is a typical day like for you living in NYC? What type of things do you encounter?
My life is pretty normal, sometimes boring. (Laughs). I go to work and I go out every once in a while.
12. Do you ever wonder what the days would be like had you not been brave enough to follow your heart?
I know I would be unhappy. I wouldn’t be ME!
13. Do you feel there are enough resources geared towards transgenders and those who are considering it?
Yes and no. I feel that there are more readily available resources for Trans Men than Trans Women. It seems to be more acceptable.
14. Outside of this interview, are there other ways can you contribute to educate others about who are?
My method would be verbal education. I am not shy and do not mind answering questions.
15. What is the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the following words?
Woman: glamorous
Man: dominate
Unique: ME!
Change: To be comfortable enough to live the way you are
DinMag: Empowerment. A lifestyle. Knowledge.
16. Is there anything that you would like to say to the readers of DinMag?
Thank you to the creator and Jay for thinking of me to be a part of DinMag. If we all stick together, we can break the barrier of adversity! There is no I in TEAM!
Interview Questions Created by: Mary P
Phone Interview Conducted by: Dez
*COMING SOON:PEARLS--The Magazine For Femmes &TransWomen*
